A crush is the same irresppective of age!!!!! Whether you are 15 or 25, all crushes do are crush you. I have reached an age in life where I thought crushes don’t happen but I was bitten and shut down!!! (I guess I wasn’t hot enough for him…lol).
Any hoo, talking to a good friend of mine the other day she pointed out the sad reality that us mid-20’s femmes have to contend with…..LOVE is a fairytale concept and not a valid reason to stay in a relationship with someone, It’s all about security….sad as hell but it is about being secure, especially in this Jamaica. Its something I always knew but hearing it from her was a jolt because this is someone who has always held my fairy tale ideal of waiting for that wonderful man deserving of all the love it is possible to give any one human. I guess that idea was destroyed with the relationships which have passed.
I am a victim of the “Love Concept”.
My “Love Concept” usually entails the participants supporting each other emotionally, being a real friend to each other, having fun, sharing a mutual respect, caring for each other, and sharing the responsibilities of the relationship (not blaming everyone else). Every relationship I’ve had I was under the impression that I was being a good girlfriend but I guess the young men saw it otherwise. Like I found out that my last boyfriend (we were together for 2 years or so i think) moved in with his new girlfriend of less that one year. Of course, I was so hurt by that because I was there with him for so long and all I got were promises and let downs. When I told my good friend, her answer was simple…..new girl is probably a girl that demands certain things or maybe she is the elusive “one.” Who knows what it is really. All I am sure of is that its time for me to stop being an understanding girlfriend and be a fake barbie (and not the Nicki Minaj type) bitch type inside and out….they seem to get way more “respect”. Its sad that throughout life, men constantly think with their penis…sigh
I refuse though to let the stupidity of a few men rob every inch of hope…but dare I say it, I am considering this whole security thing more seriously. No gold digging!!! I’m just going to dig deep into my soul and bring out the inner strength and the inner vavavavoom…….until then, I will continue to observe. XOXO